Superhero DINOSAURS!

Flicker user and artist d.r3sto* has created these fucking awesome illustrations of a selection of Cretaceous Super heroes! They are all awesome with a capital ZOMFG!!! although these are my faves ...

Nightcrawlimimus

AnklyTHORus

Captain Ameritops

Paracyclophus

All are available as prints from here

More Jurassic park

I don't know what it is lately...
Heres my girlfriend as Dr. Ellie Sattler sifting through Dino poo, Shes currently doing a dissertation on equine fecal matter, so I thought this scene was pretty apt.

Oh and if you don't get the reference... It's here

Jurassic Lark

My good friend Luke, has the tendency to shout 'Anal' at every moment... we both like dinosaurs... so I rewrote the Iconic Jurassic park scene with us in (and my mate Phil as the lawyer) this is the result...

Its rough as hell but meh...

It's what I Go to School For...

This is Totally how I feel about education...

Via: SMBC Comics  (Cheers Joe!)

New year, Christmas and Dinosaurs

Ah ! Here it is! i wondered where the hell I had abandoned my blog allowing it to gather metaphorical tinterweb dust.
Millions of probably amazing things have more than likely occurred, but the most prominent of these occasions has indeed been Christmas and New Year.
My Christmas has been a fairly laid back and simple affair, after Heathrow decided that it was incapable of dealing with frozen precipitation, it decided to call it a day, and so mine and Annas trip to Denmark was subsequently  called off, but hey it meant i had £200 surplus so we went off and bought epic amounts of food, made a den and hibernated for a few days surviving on chocolate, marzipan and duck, devoid from family members that had consumed too much or children bouncing on your head proclaiming that 'Santa has Come!' repeatedly.
This was also our time to test our culinary skills, as neither of us have ever cooked duck before, but a few guesstimates later and we ended up with this badman!

Its basically a miss-match of Danish and English Christmas cuisine, and even if the idea of Yorkshire Puds and raspberry salad do sound a little 'experimental', there is absolutely no doubt that it filled a hole.
Christmas morning saw the appearance of 'Mike the Enigmatic Dinosaur' whose expression was dependant on the angle in which you gazed at him...

Mike also has the uncanny ability to act as a transportation device (in the form of a space hopper) and a seat, which comes in handy! :D

So after Endless films had been broadcast, it was time for new year.
It may be because i wasn't invited to any amazing party or something, but i still maintain that new years celebrations are horrendously overrated. It just seems to me that new years is a night where partying is mandatory, and it forces people out that don't really want to be there. I don't want to be told when i have to get inebriated and kiss people, I'm more than capable of doing that on my own thank you! One day I will be all ready to go on a 'Mad One' but until that day comes, or Russell Brand/Rolf Harris invites me to a 'Banging new year rave' I have no intention of going out because some Anglo Saxon decided 'Every year on this night we should get wankered'
But because we try to minimise how dull and boring we are, and slow the aging process we decided to embark on a day trip, and where better to feel young than at a mueseum?
So off we trundled to the laaandon tawn's natural history museum, armed with dinosaur biccies and ham sandwiches!

My fave bit was by far the new Darwin wing which was full of specimen jars, and being a bit of a nature geek and a massive steampunk fan, I may of wee'd a little because i was so excited,

The octo's  where gorgeous to look at but me and anna had to wait roughly 4 years to see them because some dick  Art student sat there taking photo's, if you turned your flash off woman you can take perfect pictures, you penis, but as you can see it was well worth the wait  :D

I don't know why i love stuff in jar's in reality its a pretty morbid practice, but i think its a lot more tastefull then traditional taxidermy, for one the specimins can be used at a later date for dissection ect, so the animal may not of neccesarilly died in vain. Additionally pickling prevents mishappen faces, so foxes don't look like they are staring in to the lost arc  

Also it allows for accidental poses, as seen in the crocodilian below that appears to be singing in the shower, he looks so happy, propping himself up on the jar like that.

The fish bones were uber pretty after being dyed the little plaice thing below is simply gorgeous and the shark cartillage below is equally as awesome

I think what I really alike about collections like this is the sense or 'organised Chaos' essentially is some biologist showing stuff in jars and writing on a label everything he can possibly  think of, yes there is a standardised procedure, but looking at the menagerie of labels and stickers its clear some individuals have disregarded these codes of practise as worthless. There are no standard Jar sizes, labels, fonts or preparation techniques its a scientific free for all, with the curators solely responsible with trying to create some form of order in the chaos that is a scientific collection.

Although i love all of this stuff my highlight of the day was a 5 year old girl in the line to go in, how after being left to her own devices by her mother found some 'working girl' leaflets, with their funbags all hanging out, attracted by the bright colours picking them up and proud as ever revealing her find to her mum, who promptly snatched them from her embarrassed and quickly disposed of them, meanwhile me and anna were a chuckling with amusement

Like this only more pornographic Via

What I failed to see was a kid on a scooter shortly after whizz down the expansive ramp that leads up to the main entrance with his mum having kittens running behind...

Pic unrelated Via

SALT DOUGH!

I have no idea where the urge came from, but it surfaced with such excitement that nothing would quell my desire  to make some form of creation from the medium that is salt dough. Salt dough is a medium usually linked to poorly formed 'tot sculptures' which beg the question 'mate, seriously, what the hell is that?' a question which is instead twisted and reformed by professionals  into 'sooooo....tell me about your sculpture'. The child involved will then offer an exclamation so lucid that even an LSD seems dull in comparison, after which the child's mother involved would demand that it sits pride of place on the mantelpiece to advertise to any visitors that the child of the household has the artistic ability of a lemon. Bless
Basically i just wanted a play, and i broke Anna's room plaque that her niece made because it was shit I was drunk, so i totally owed her one. so as usual I over stocked on salt (i bought 5 times more than i actually needed)
and used this recipe

SALT DOUGH
1 cup of  table salt
1 cup of water
2 cups of flour

Throw the salt and flour in a bowl, then gradually add the water  untill it makes dough, of it's to sticky add flour and if its too dry add more water...
And I don't mean American cups either, I just mean A cup (obviously the bigger the cup the more you will make)

And this is what I made...

with the dinosaur being my favourite...OBVIOUSLY!
You can leave it to air dry (takes a day or two  or cook it on low heat, what i didnt realise is that it still takes a billion hours on low temp (50-100 Degrees C)  so i did it for an hour and then left it to air dry for the remainder of the time :D

Dinosaurs!

So this week i went to Annas, and revelled in the joy that is a partnership, i'm not one for public affection, but we had a snazztastic time :D
on our travels around the ever so popular tourist destination that is Maidstone, a place renound for for its classy inhabitants, beautiful architecture and pristine river water... well maybe not, but I digress. SO in TKmax we hunted for some suitable winter attire, however after feeling swamped with unsuitable clothing for nearly an hour, i tugged on the rope tied to my waist 3 times and was returned to the the surface.
And then i saw it, its surface distorting the surrounding space, glinting, as if flaunting its brilliance, dancing its seductive dance...

Yes its crude as hell, but it's DINOSAURS FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!!!1!!!!!oneone!!!1eleven, admittedly it drawn in a style similar to medieval bibles and for 30 quid I'm sure i could get a decent scientific etching for that, but still it filled the world, for a second with glee of that found only within 5 year old's.

Obviously I am easily entertained and a randomly, well placed dinosaur related object is all needed to make my day, so here i am cheerfully beaming in the fact i have seen this monstrosity of an art piece (i love the grumpy triceratops in the centre of the painting XD ) and i go nect door to hobby craft where i manage to pick up this little fella for a few (3) quid...

A VELOCERAPTOR!?!?!! probably the most badass of all dinosaurs portrayed by film? yes please!
so i pick up this cheeky little gift to myself to entertain me for an hour or so whilst the bird is doing boring degree related follies...
After 15 minuites of quizzical brow scratching, eye strain and a spattering of dinosaur noises i begin to realise that this 'little model' isn't going to be so little after all...its FUCKING EPIC! its man sized!

That my friend's is the BARGAIN of the century!

YEAH ROY!:D :D

Meanwhile On the Internet...

Source: loldwell via thedailywh.at

Also... THIS is pretty cool

Everytime someone joins the group ect this guy gets submerged in skittles... a good waste of the internets power i feel :D

The commentator is just talking rubbish throughout the whole thing and its a bit funny :F

'he looks frustrated like he's struggling at sudoku'

i don't really like skittles

A sad fact of life...

see more Funny Graphs

:( true though
Source: Graphjam

Uncyclopedia- Everything that Wikipedia used to be

when searching for orange's Awesomasaurus ad campaign (which i still cannot find a picture of) i came accross Uncyclopedia, filling the gap that the new, moderated wikipedia has left (see Last post), its just full of nonsense, and occasionly some whitty well written entry turns up

''Given the controversial nature of Awesomesaurus, the genus has often been overlooked in the mainstream. Many Anning followers felt vindicated, however, when Michael Crichton included a pointed reference to Awesomesaurus in Jurassic Park.


“If we hatch an Awesomesaurus, how the hell will we feed it? Impossible. We'd need the whole rest of the island, every day of the week.”

~ Dr. Ian Malcolm (character from Jurrasic Park) on Awesomesaurus''

i checked the chicken article as well because i hoped that  Ryan north's legacy still existed... some of the best stuff i found was ii HERE

''What happened to the chicken since it was a T-Rex? In direct rebuke of the chicken's royal and reptilian aspirations, modern chicken have been so modified that now they do not so much resemble the Rex as they do the common garden slug, itself a sad parody of the more graceful snail. The science of eugenics, pioneered by evil men like Charles Darwin, Colonel C. H. Sanders, and Adolph Hitler, led to the manipulation of the chicken's once terrifying genes, twisting and changing them into something base and disgusting''

Although i see the need for a boring informative thing such as wikipedia... i still love this  :D

yeah a Nazi T-REX

Things I Like

This


And This

(ithink its much better than the origional)

and probably some other stuff :D